Communication & Conflict Resolution
Although we speak with people every day, true communication is an entirely more personal and dynamic event that is critical for growth in relationships and understanding. Men and women inherently communicate differently, so it should be no surprise when communication challenges arise between couples and in families. Since effective communication is essential to moving ahead in life, when there are problems relating to each other, it can prove extremely detrimental to any relationship. Most of us understand what communication means by definition but we often completely fail in understanding its process and raw power to influence radical change in all areas of life. Many marriages completely end on this one component alone. Both spouses may love each other dearly, but without proper communication, that love goes unnoticed and the result is often terrible and tragic. In families, miscommunication or the lack of communication can build mountains between members and create lasting hurt.
It is estimated that when awake, we spend approximately 70% our time communicating, 30% of which is talking. This means that over half of our communication is non-verbal. More often than not, it is not what you say but how you say it that can create problems in relationships. Patterns of interaction are learned in our early years and can impact adult relationships. Learning to communicate so everyone involved feels heard is hard work, but not impossible. The good news is that even the worst communicators can learn effective skills that can positively impact every relationship.
How do I know whether I or my family needs professional help in this area?
Communication problems are like a ticking time bomb, and many do not even know that time is running out on the shortening fuse. Here are a few early warning signs that a relationship in is trouble:
Do you and your partner or family member have consistent unresolved arguments?
Do you often leave a conversation not feeling understood or accepted?
Is someone in your family unhappy most of the time?
Do you no longer doing things together or anticipate times of interaction with dread?
Do difficult conversations remind you of people you know from your childhood or past?
Are you beginning to question whether or not you feel “in love” with your spouse or are you are contemplating having an affair?
Do you feel constantly tired, depressed, distracted at work yet lack the desire to return home at the end of your work day?
At Renew Counseling Center, we are committed to working with couples and families to develop healthy communication styles and improving how each person relates within the relationship. Through counseling you can learn what drives and sustains the tension in your relationship and find effective ways to better understand each other and develop the communication skills necessary to resolve fights on a regular basis whether it is a minor issue or a significant aspect of life.